Musings of a young black weirdo


Maybe if I [verb], [noun] can/can’t/will/won’t/would/wouldn’t [verb].

Maybe if I act white, people won’t think I’m a stereotype.

Maybe if I wear expensive clothes, I can impress the cool kids.

Maybe if I have sex with him, he will love me.

Maybe if I act smart, people won’t realize I don’t know what’s going on.

Maybe if I act dumb, people won’t think I’m so weird.

Maybe if I act straight, I can keep my friends.

Maybe if I smoke weed, I can forget about my problems.

Maybe if I don’t get in his way, he won’t hit me.

Maybe if I cut myself, I will feel better.

Maybe if I throw up my food, my parents will stop fighting.

Maybe if I steal these shoes, my mom will finally pay attention to me.

Maybe if I get all A’s, my dad will come back.

Maybe if I act “normal,” I will eventually be “normal.”


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